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Daily Deviation
December 1, 2009
Ever get tired of watching movies where the villain reveals the plot to the hero strapped to the torture device, and then leaves the room before the hero dies? The Meaning Of Evil by ~blizzardwolf1 is a humorous piece illustrating how common scenarios would play out if the villain had a brain.
Featured by SparrowSong
Literature
Like a Man
"Please," he whimpered, eyes cast up from the polished linoleum as if in prayer, a single rivulet of blood trickling from a nostril. "I… I have a family."
"A family?" Charlie glanced from one crumpled heap of flesh and gristle to another, a distinct disinterest building behind insect black eyes. "How many kids?"
"I… t-two."
"Boy or girl?"
"Both boys."
He squatted next to the man, spinning the massive .357 on his finger like the protagonist of some spaghetti western. The barrel whirled around the blur of his hand like Death's private helicopter, gaining and losing momentum in an evident but indecipherable rhythm. He blew a
Literature
Notice of Intent to Stalk
Form ITS1993(d)
Notice of Intent to Stalk
Date: ___________
Print or type name of Stalker: _____________________________
(known henceforth as STALKER)
Print or type name of person to be Stalked: __________________________
(known henceforth as STALKEE)
Please be notified that effective this date the above named STALKER has filed an official Intent To Stalk Declaration targeting the above named STALKEE in accordance with Obsessive/Compulsive Personal Pursuit Code of Conduct Act of 1993 (OCPPCCA93).
I, STALKER, hereby declare Open Season upon you, STALKEE, and pursuant to OCPPCCA93 section 1, paragraph 5 intend to engage in the following
Literature
A cappella
My mother, a famous classical violinist in her day, was on her deathbed and I didn't care. She was bedridden by the usual suspects, old age and a fall, and had been for many months when they called me. "Come see her," they said. "She'll pass on soon." They told me the nurses played Tchaikovsky, her favorite.
"No," I said, and hung up the phone, slamming it against the wall, the cord jerking about in a wild dance. I glared at my CD player, as though it would suddenly come to life with violin concertos, then grabbed my coat, and left the house.
The critics never tired of sayin
Suggested Collections
"Eviiiillllll, (more evil than violence)
Violeennnt (more violent than deaaaath)
Day-eeetttth (more deadly than maaaaaaaaaaannnn)
I am, yeahyeah, I'm evil, I aaaammmmmmm..."
Megadeth - Prince of Darkness
I'm sorry. I just plain had fun with this one, so if it reads kinda half together, that's why. Now before I start getting hate mail, let me give proper credit where credit is due. With the exception of the last one, none of these settings are my original creation. They're each taken from The Evil Overlord List, and The Evil Overlord List: Cellblock A.
The last one is something I mostly threw together, literally as I was posting this, and is loosely based on #109 in Cellblock A. As for the others, I'm just gonna let you peruse the list and see if you can pick them out. It'll make you read the lists anyways, which definitely ought to be required reading.
Evil Commander Kyle is also the only character that belongs to me. Otherwise I'm pretty sure everyone else is firmly in the realm of the pubic domain.
The preview image is lovingly provided by ~Stock-A-Doodle-Doo, and can be found right here: irate+flag+stock&qh=boost%3Apopular+age_sigma%3A24h+age_scale%3A5"
Violeennnt (more violent than deaaaath)
Day-eeetttth (more deadly than maaaaaaaaaaannnn)
I am, yeahyeah, I'm evil, I aaaammmmmmm..."
Megadeth - Prince of Darkness
I'm sorry. I just plain had fun with this one, so if it reads kinda half together, that's why. Now before I start getting hate mail, let me give proper credit where credit is due. With the exception of the last one, none of these settings are my original creation. They're each taken from The Evil Overlord List, and The Evil Overlord List: Cellblock A.
The last one is something I mostly threw together, literally as I was posting this, and is loosely based on #109 in Cellblock A. As for the others, I'm just gonna let you peruse the list and see if you can pick them out. It'll make you read the lists anyways, which definitely ought to be required reading.
Evil Commander Kyle is also the only character that belongs to me. Otherwise I'm pretty sure everyone else is firmly in the realm of the pubic domain.
The preview image is lovingly provided by ~Stock-A-Doodle-Doo, and can be found right here: irate+flag+stock&qh=boost%3Apopular+age_sigma%3A24h+age_scale%3A5"
Mature
© 2007 - 2024 blizzardwolf1
Comments70
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Excellent showing how events would happen if a villain would FOR ONCE follow the evil overlord list! Kudos to you!